Halfway Through Summer

I like things that have a beginning, middle and an end.  I don’t know if it’s because I like the structure or whether it’s because I like the inevitable certainty, but it’s even how I write.  I like having a nice beginning that gets you into the story.  I like having a good middle section where you can really see what’s going on, and then I like having a nice ending that ties it all together. 

I think my need for this type of structure is one of the reasons I like living in the Midwest where we have seasonal changes.  Sure, the winters are too long and the summers are too short, and usually we’re left wondering what happened to spring and fall, but at least our seasons have beginnings and endings.

And, of course, I have come up with my own system of figuring out when they start, when we’re in the middle of a season and when they end. 

For instance, I know fall starts when the paddle season starts.  I know winter is coming to an end when the paddle season ends.  I know when we return from spring break that spring is officially underway here in the Midwest (yeah it literally takes that long for spring to arrive – we’re talking early to mid April).  And I know that Halloween will be the last of any fall weather we’ll have, and that winter is coming fast (the weather in October can be downright lovely, but after that it’s all downhill, and it’s downhill in a hurry).   

Identifying the middle of the season is harder, but I don’t need the local news to tell me that the days are slowly but surely getting shorter, or that the July humidity is high to know that we’re halfway through summer.  I know because the half dozen pairs of swim goggles that I had purchased back in May are now gone.  Despite putting our last name on the goggles in permanent marker, and keeping them all in one central location, they are all gone.  The only pair of goggles I have in my house is a pink pair of Hello Kitty goggles that I’ve NEVER SEEN BEFORE. 

I know we’re halfway through summer because the grass that I had worked so hard to keep green is now starting to turn brown, and frankly I don’t care.  Back in April and May and even June I worked like a dog to keep my grass green.  I seeded bare patches.  I fertilized.  And I developed an every-other-day watering routine.  There was Ireland, and then there was my back yard.  It really looked that good.  Now it’s turning a light brown and I just don’t care.  We’re halfway through summer.

We have officially stopped trying to have family dinner.  With baseball games almost every night and kids needing to be everywhere at once, we have finally succumbed and don’t even try to plan it.  My wife has an extended holiday from making dinner.  Go Roma, Yard House, The Landmark and Little Louie’s, as well as the occasional pizza or mac n cheese have become our staples.

I’m officially bored with baseball, and I’m already reading all the articles in the paper about the Bears.  Bring on football.  Granted some of my disinterest in baseball has to do with the fact that YET AGAIN the Cubs suck, but still, this is right around the time where I start wondering who’s playing on the offensive line and whose returning punts. 

My car gets washed less right around this time of year.  At the beginning of summer I wash my car weekly.  After an entire winter of snow and slush and road salt all I want is a nice, clean car.  I don’t stop for gas once in early summer without also going through the car wash.  But now who cares?  It’s a hassle at this point.  My car’s been cleaned.  I know it looks nice when it’s clean, but fuck it.  Hopefully it will rain soon and wash some of the tree sap off of it.

I stop hassling my wife about scheduling date nights.  Usually I’m all for our regular Saturday night date night, and if we miss a couple weeks in a row I’ll start to bug her about it.  But this is the time of year where my wife wants to dine outside at some outdoor café or she wants to get lawn seats at some outdoor music festival or she wants to head downtown to walk Michigan Avenue.  No thanks.  If I wanted to be eaten by mosquitoes or eat dinner while dripping sweat I could just stay home and eat in my own backyard.  I start pushing again for date night around mid September.  Between now and then I have Domino’s pizza on speed dial and over 50 movie channels.

It’s not that I want summer to end, or that I’m getting tired of it.  I don’t wish for the cold weather to arrive – although it would be nice for the kids to go back to school soon – but I refuse to buy more goggles or a match for the one lone black croc, and the tree sap and the yard have defeated me.  I’m just going to relax more and enjoy the second half of the season.